The “What I Had to Put Up With” Memory Trap

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That time you didn’t pull her chair out in 1994 still festers underneath her dissimulating smiley face

If there’s one feature of today’s women in Anglo culture I genuinely can’t stand, it’s the “What I had to put up with” memory trap. It is truly astonishing to witness this purge of pent up hatred surge forth from the mouth of a woman who, like a black widow, is going in for the metaphorical kill of a male who is no longer a worthy utility object or meal ticket in her mind and must be disposed of.

Here’s a personal anecdote about the memory trap.

I was dating the daughter of an executive back in my “hollow man” television newscaster days, and the relationship seemed to be going swimmingly. Or, at least that’s what I thought. She was talking about marriage and such, and almost had me lulled into a sense of false security.

Then, it happened.

The day after Christmas, a holiday in which we enjoyed what I thought was a wonderful time, she suddenly decided to break up with me because I wore a pair of jeans that didn’t fit the way she thought they should fit to her parents’ house. I “embarrassed” her. Her friends and family were there. Why didn’t I wear another pair? Why did I have to exercise so much? Blah, blah, blah.

Indeed, the jeans were slightly too big on me, because I had lost a few pounds from bicycling around 100 miles a week. Mind you, they weren’t sagging off my ass and I didn’t look like a thug. They just fit loosely. I had never been dumped because of misfit jeans before.

But, as we all know, in America if the woman in the relationship isn’t happy it’s fine for her do whatever it takes to make herself happy, even if that means destroying lives and livelihoods. But if a man isn’t happy with his goddess… er… lady he’s supposed to suck it up, buckle down, and take whatever she’s dishing out. That’s the insanity of this Puritan-based culture.

When I didn’t beg her back (I immediately drove out of town, into Mexico and started spreading my seed with other women as life experience has taught me to never let a bitch get you down) she finally let go of the pent up hate she had been saving up, and out of her mouth came the recounting of all the perceived slights she “had to put up with” since we started dating. I had no idea what vitriol she had sublimated under her cheery exterior until that moment.

The things she ranted about were so insignificant I forgot what most of it was about. Seriously. I just remember as it happened the distinct feeling her beefs were things I would have never thought a woman would get so upset about and harbor such feelings of resentment over.

But then, I realized this is something I had seen women do since I was a youngster. The playbook went like this. Women would play along with men who they perceived had value, until the men no longer provided said value. These bitches would then let loose the hounds of hell of female psychology, spitting the most foul vitriol one could imagine when the time came for the poor bastard to be cut loose from his provider or sexual entertainer role.

I’ve heard women recount slights from years, or even decades or generations ago that amount to nothing more than a passel of minutiae. He didn’t buy some bauble she wanted. He didn’t offer her dessert at restaurant. He didn’t prostrate himself before her when she was in a bad mood or PMSing or some other bullshit.

It never mattered what sacrifices he made and how much he had put up with from her. It was typical, nauseating female solipsism taken to the Nth degree each and every time. This reinforces the TNMM idea that men are nothing more than utility and success objects in the female mind.

What sins have you committed in your girl’s mind? You’ll find out when she wants to dispose of you

The Dark World Inside the Female Mind

If it’s been said once, it needs to be said a thousand times, the more you know about female psychology the less you will like women. I’ve gone through nearly 150 women myself and I’ve learned what works, what doesn’t work, what they like, what they don’t like, what they think, and what they don’t think.

It’s a strange and dark world inside the female brain. Once you know women well, you will NEVER see them the same way again. They’re definitely NOT sugar, spice, and everything nice. You are dealing with a creature that sees you as nothing more than something it can consume. This culture has a way of amplifying negative female traits, on top of it all.

Make no mistake, if you have a woman in your life she has your slights and foibles catalogued in her nuerons, often with time and date stamps. They’re ammo, ready to character assassinate you at her will.

Making matters worse, when it comes to the “What I had to put up with” memory trap is a man never actually knows he’s “stepped in it” until either the relationship ends or his woman wants to throw a nuclear shit test his way. Actual, or most often, perceived slights fester and boil, hidden under the surface like toxins in a witch’s cauldron. Then one day, they boil over and burn the man psychologically, and financially if he’s made the unfortunate mistake of attaching himself to her legally.

Women enjoy telling men how we can do better. Ladies, here’s a way you can do better. Let shit go. Especially insignificant shit. Get over yourselves, and stop filling your memories with the victimization inherent in the “What I had to put up with” mentality.

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5 comments

  • GOD, this was a terrific column, It’s exactly what I went through in my marriage (*shudder*), all the real or perceived slights, the petty vindictiveness about trivial nonsense, the self-absorption and tyranny of a woman who believed that the world revolved around her. Unfortunately, I had to wait until the kids were grown to escape that death-web, just to ensure that they weren’t destroyed by her vile behavior. I left her a bit more than three years ago. (talk about a stunned woman, that “her” slave would dare leave!) She dragged out the divorce for nearly two years, trying to bankrupt me, and the cost was astounding. But, It was worth it, every damned penny. Eighteen months since the ink dried on the final decree, and I’m finally able to see a financially stable future, and retirement in five years or so (I’m nearly 60). Ride my motorcycle to relax; dating when I want; enjoying a nearly stress-free life (except for the demands of work, of course) ; no one to bitch at me when I get home; I do what I want on the weekends instead of constantly trying to keep up the care and maintenance of a too-large damned house. Life is finally good.

    Men, don’t be a fool – – it’s a rigged game that you can’t win. Never cohabitate, never marry!

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  • This column really hit the bulls eye with me. My first wife, she could never ever ever forget a dang thing that was bad. I put up with it for a while and then I just had to go. The thing is, what she kept on bringing that she just couldn’t stop bringing up were trivial things that had been said years before (by me) and that I had apologized for. Let’s move on. Not posible with her. It became like torture for me! Really. That and that alone caused me to end the relationship.

    And that’s been true of other women in my life, too. My second wife, other women I’ve lived with, my own sister.

    It’s like have any of these women thought of, um, just MOVING ON?

    Wtf?

    Great column. I’ve been doing MGTOW for a while. That may change someday soon. I doubt if I’ll ever live with a woman again tho.

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  • Feminism is a long con and a massive distortion history on a never before seen scale. If there ever were a ‘patriarchy’, it was composed of a tiny minority of very rich, very powerful men. Most men didn’t have the right to vote until they agreed to exchange their lives for that right during the Civil War – all to protect women and the state. Even today, only boys are required to sign up for selective service at age 18 – and there are around 5M more women in the US than men – all to protect women and the state. Men were not ‘given’ the right to vote. Women were ‘given’ the right to vote.

    Feminism is one gigantic falsehood. You’ll never hear a feminist address the ’empathy gap’ in which men receive far harsher sentences than women for the same crime. You’ll never hear a feminist address the ‘tax gap’, in which men pay the vast majority of taxes and always have. You’ll never hear a feminist address the ‘suicide gap’, in which men are the vast majority of suicides. The ‘war and workplace death gap’? You won’t hear a peep. They only complain of the wage gap, which has been repeatedly proven as false. Feminism is simply the desire for forced wealth transfer from men to women & the state (socialism).

    Feminists hide the history or racism and anti-male sexism (white feather campaign) so abundant in the feminist foundation. When feminists do address the gaps that negatively affect men, they do so only to sweep them aside in favor of the issues that affect women.

    Even today, with enlistment and combat positions open to women, only 14% of the military are female and most of those women are in support positions – forcing more men to the front lines. Somehow, there are now 68 female generals – though the vast, vast majority of combat deaths are male. That’s what we call ‘Affirmative Action’. Passing over men who earned those positions in favor of appeasing women’s demands.

    To wit:

    #1: Everything upon the earth was built by men. There’s not a single, substantial structure on the earth primarily built by women.

    #2: It was men that were trafficked, exploited, used, manipulated, brainwashed and disposed of in all the wars for the advancement of women and the state.

    #3: Men have always been primarily responsible for working the most dirty, most dangerous, most life shortening, most back breaking jobs, for the advancement of women and the state.

    #4: Women demand quotas only in the most prestigious, most powerful, most lucrative positions and didn’t demand their place in employment until after men made work relatively safe, broken nail free and mussed hair proof.

    #5: Men pay the majority of taxes, but the vast majority of spending on healthcare, welfare and education is spent at the state and federal level on women.

    #6: The vast majority of alimony, asset division and child support flows from men to women.

    #7: Trillions in wealth and power have been forcefully transferred, via state power, from men to women and the state through Affirmative Action, Title IX, alimony, asset division and child support (alimony++).

    #8: Affirmative Consent – a feminist creation like no-fault divorce (legislation written by NAWL), seeks to remove men’s rights to presumption of innocence and due process at the behest of a woman scorned, on her word alone.

    #9: Feminists, while standing tall against the idea of men defining femininity, insist on defining and redefining masculinity.

    #10: Feminists claim sole ownership of victimhood and ignore the many benefits patriarchy has bestowed upon women whilst also ignoring the billions of male victims of gynocentrism.

    There are reasons why so many loathe feminism – and they’re all good reasons.

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  • The Angry Outernationalist

    An over-inflated sense of entitlement + Violation of expectations = The “What I Had to Put Up With” Memory Trap.

    The key mistake here is that these women believe they’re the prizes.

    I have yet to meet a single American woman who was worth the hype.

    I’ve met plenty, and I’d have likely married one if they were worth it.

    The correct mindset for men is to keep reminding themselves that they are the prize.

    Men bring most of the resources, most of the strength, and most of the stability needed for such a thing as a family.

    And men should never, ever forget that.

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  • As Chris Rock joked, it’s impossible to make a woman happy. Can’t do it. She is guaranteed to complain and be unhappy. Now, five years as a post-40 widower, I see the reality and dread even getting invited to weddings, which I view as a ticking time-bomb / funeral for the man. I won’t remarry and won’t date anyone past the ‘honeymoon’ phase of a relationship. I’m out after the first fight/drama. My advice to anyone that wants loyalty and a companion, get a dog (I have two). Dogfood and walks are always cheaper and more relaxed than house/car/jewelry/dinners/divorce. My conversations with my ‘kids’ are a lot more interesting, too!

    Liked by 1 person

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